Review: Loving Homosexuals as Jesus Would
by Chad W. Thompson
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review by Mary Heathman
IF THE READER reads as I read—from the very beginning—he or she will notice right away a preview of the tone and power of this book. Author and pastoral counselor Joe Dallas writes in the foreword, “this is a book that will offend some, instruct many, and be relevant to all.”
At times as I read, I wanted to stand up and cheer! Chad Thompson has written a courageous book. He isn't afraid to quote a self-avowed atheist who happens also to be a critic of gay activism. He sounds a prophet's exhortation, calling the Body of Christ to task for its failure to love as Jesus loved.
Thompson's personal experience and subsequent study have prepared him well for the writing of this book. A writer and speaker living in Des Moines, Iowa, he writes that the purpose of his book is to “teach Christians how to love homosexuals, which is our calling.” He goes on to provide powerful instruction about not only loving homosexuals, but about how the Body of Christ has, by and large, not loved them, and what we can do about it—Loving Homosexuals As Jesus Would.
“We owe the homosexual community some recognition that while some of their hardships may have been caused by promiscuity or poor lifestyle choices on their part, some have been caused by uncaring or uneducated Christians,” Thompson exhorts. “We must promise to do better.” (p. 84)
The author refers to and describes the spiritual battle over the hearts of lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgendered (LGBT) people. The war going on in the spiritual realm over souls is playing itself out in human relationship over the hearts of LGBT individuals. “While the church and the homosexual will always disagree on ideas, we must realize that the battle we fight, ultimately, is not about the cessation of gay curriculum in public schools, the validity of a change in sexual orientation, or even about the credibility of the latest gene research. Rather, the battle we fight is a battle for the hearts of our world's LGBT people. And whoever loves first, wins.” (p. 63)
Thompson's personal story in the first chapters explodes stereotypes about homosexuality. Chapter four follows with a constructive critique of current methods to combat biased teaching of homosexuality in public schools. Chapter five is a passable primer on what science has discovered. Chapters six and seven provide a plausible and well-documented explanation of the causes of homosexuality and the process of change of sexual orientation. Thompson weaves his stated main point—loving homosexuals—throughout every chapter.
If I were to highlight only one quote from this book, it would be, “I believe that loving gay people requires us to fight for their right to live outside the closet without consequence, whether or not we agree with homosexuality.” (p. 29) In this one sentence, Thompson boldly states a strong point. In the rest of the book, he drives it home repeatedly.
In addition to “fighting for their right to live outside of the closet without consequence,” Thompson advocates Christians inviting homosexuals into relationship and loving them as one would any other person. The linchpin of Loving Homosexuals As Jesus Would is the individual man, or woman, who will come alongside homosexual men and women and offer genuine relationship, including non-erotic physical affection.
In addition to the overarching theme—new and healthy relationships as antidote to old and unhealthy patterns of a recovering homosexual's past—Thompson offers a practical list to cast a vision for ways to “frame our love to them in such a way they will understand.” The list includes a range of suggestions from the mundane, “invite them home to a meal,” to the more irregular, “attend gay rallies to offer cold water and pizza.” (p. 59)
Drawing support from biblical stories like Jesus and the woman at the well and Paul's ministry at Mars Hill, Thompson notes that Jesus and Paul sought common ground with their hearers. He goes on to say: “Churches find common ground with youth, foreign language and customs, but have Christians found our common ground with the lesbian and gay community?” (p. 45)
I found the previous points a compelling call to love the homosexual as Jesus would. I believe this book can benefit the person who wants to understand the issues surrounding homosexuality. Equally important, it will instruct men and women who want to love as Jesus loved and provide guidance for homosexual persons who want a way out.
I graded Loving Homosexuals As Jesus Would as a “B,” noting a couple of important omissions. A weakness of this book, common to most books on ministry to homosexuals, lies in its neglect to address the differences between male and female homosexuality, which are considerable.
Another personal concern is that Thompson seems to assume that the prerequisite relationships he talks about as foundational for healing are readily available for the homosexual man or woman seeking help. This is not always, or even often, so. When such an isolated seeker, with no such relationships available, reads, “Once the emotional deficit that caused the homosexuality is identified and allowed to surface, non-erotic affirmation from one's parents, peers, or surrogates can be properly internalized,” he or she is likely to be disheartened. This book would have benefited from a good discussion of the circumstances of folks such as these, and how the people of God can help them.
However, having stated my observations about what could have made the book better, I must end my comments with a hearty endorsement of Chad Thompson's book. I have moved it to the top priority on my recommended reading list.
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